In The Home Stretch- Thoughts at 30 Weeks

It is currently 7:00am on a Saturday. I have been WIDE awake for two hours now. I have come the realization my body is preparing me for the sleepless nights and days to come. I am perfectly fine with that. Seriously. I am. This week was filled to the brim with new things. Since I love bullet points, here are a few:

• I had my 29w check-up sans ultrasound on Wednesday. Ryker and Averlee's heartbeats sounded absolutely beautiful on the Doppler. My urine was clear of any infections or protein. My blood pressure was close enough to normal.
• As of Wednesday, I am under doctor's orders to cut back my work days to half days. This was actually more of a joint decision. I had told my doctor a few weeks ago that the end of the month/ end of the year gets a little hectic at my work. I told him about the overtime I would be working during week 31 of pregnancy. He wasn't exactly excited about me not getting the amount of rest I needed. He told me I could work up until the day of delivery, but the most important thing for me to do was take care of myself. So.... I now work until 1:00 in the afternoons, come home, do a few house wifey/ Mommy things, and take a nap. It is amazing how much of a difference a REAL afternoon nap makes in my energy level and just how I feel overall.
• I'm outgrowing clothes at a ridiculous fast pace. Hello growth spurt?!
• Braxton Hicks contractions have made their way into my life. . . daily. Ouch.

This week also brought the realization I have maybe 6-8 more weeks left in this pregnancy. Maybe it is the hormones. Maybe it is the fact one year ago I never thought I would see this day. Maybe it is just me being emotional. Whatever it is, this wonderful miracle pregnancy is coming to an end. We are weeks away from seeing the faces of our sweet little miracles. Looking back on the last 30 weeks of our lives, I feel like everything flew by. I wish I had taken more time to document along the way. I wish I hadn't let 2 selfish individuals steal my joy during week 9 of our pregnancy. I wish I hadn't let their hurtful words steer me away from blogging about our miracle. I wish I had taken more time to snap pics and actually SHARE them with friends and family. This is quite possibly the last time I will experience pregnancy. This is something I waited YEARS for. This is something so many women go to bed praying for each and every night. I know. I've been there.

In addition to all of the other "new" things of week 29, I also had a friend reach out to me as she tried to cope with her own infertility situation. In all honesty, I still feel the pain from infertility. Even though I am weeks away from holding my babies, I still feel like I fit in at the infertility table. I relate to those on the infertility journey. My friend is patiently waiting on her period. She is also attending my baby shower tomorrow. My heart hurts because I remember the days of sticking more pads and tampons in my purse "just in case" as I headed out the door with a baby shower gift in hand. I remember the feelings of "will this ever be me?". I remember sitting in a room filled with "aww's and ooo's" and thinking to myself, "will I ever get to go home and show my husband OUR baby gifts?". Our day has finally come and we could not be more grateful. At the same time though, I feel like I still have one foot inside the door of infertility. I have a strong passion to help others through their journeys just as someone helped me through my own.