Happy Birthday to Ryker and Averlee! Part 2

In case you missed Part 1, you can find it here!

We had known for a while I would deliver the twins via C-section. I had slowly begun mentally preparing myself for what that would involve; however, I still was not ready. I was not ready to deliver them at 34 weeks. I kept telling Trey, "I'm not ready. They aren't ready. This cannot happen today. They cannot be born today." He just kept smiling and telling me everything would be alright. I think every nurse in the room had to give me a speech about how well I had done to carry twins to 34 weeks. It didn't matter what anyone said at that point. I knew 34 weeks was the very beginning of what we had begun to call "the safe zone". I also knew our babies would be preemies and there was absolutely nothing we could do to prevent it at that moment. Ryker and Averlee were coming even if it wasn't the most ideal situation.

I had less than 45 minutes from the time the nurse told me Dr. Williams had ordered an emergency C-section to the time they were wheeling me down the halls to the operating room. I had no time to think. I had no time to cry. It all happened so fast! As soon as the doors to the OR opened, I looked to my left and saw two bassinets. Two. I remember looking at my nurse and saying, "There's two. I'm having two babies tonight. Two miracles." Tears were rolling down my face. I couldn't decided if I was terrified or if I was overjoyed. Either way, I was ready to meet my babies.

Once they had prepped me for my C-section and started my spinal - because we had NO time for an epidural- they let Trey join me. The room was full of people! I had a team around me. Each bassinet had a team around it. I believe there were two people from the NICU in the room as well. I looked at Trey and told him to pray. I knew there was nothing we could do at this point but pray. So we did. Trey prayed over me as the doctors and nurses pulled, tugged, cut, and pushed on my body. In less than 15 minutes, Dr. Williams said, "I'll have a baby for you in just a minute, Kari!" He did. Ryker was first. The sound of his sweet little scream was absolutely beautiful. Dr. Williams gave me a quick peek of little Ryker before the nurses and doctors swept him away for his evaluation. One minute later, our precious Averlee was born. Apparently Averlee had tied her umbilical cord in a tight knot. It all made sense at that point. If I had not gone into labor when I did, we would not have known Averlee had umbilical cord problems until she was in distress. By the time we figured out she was in distress, it would have been too late.

My grandmother said it best a few days later. She said Ryker was probably saying, "Somebody has to get us out of here! My sister is in trouble!".

Shortly after Ryker and Averlee were born, Trey was instructed to follow the nurses to the NICU. I wish I had a picture of his proud face. His face was completely lit up. I was laying on the operating table just praying our babies would be ok, and Trey was beaming from ear to ear with pride. It was everything I had ever dreamt of. That moment seeing his face and hearing our little miracles crying in the background was priceless. I hope I never forget how beautiful of a moment that was.

The NICU

Ryker and Averlee were admitted to the NICU immediately after their birth. We are grateful they did not require any assistance breathing. They did require IV fluids for a few days, phototherapy for jaundice, and a warmer to help them regulate their own body temps. After a couple days, the nurses "coached" Trey and I on how to get the babies to eat. We took it day by day increasing the amount of formula or breast milk in their bottles. It was frustrating at times because we just wanted to feed our babies without having a nurse timing us, but in the greater picture, we knew we were one step closer to taking them home each time they finished their minimal feed amounts. 



Ryker

Averlee

I was discharged on December 7th. I woke up crying that morning. I knew I would be leaving the hospital with a C-section scar and empty arms. Our babies were not going home with us yet. It was almost unfair I had to wait so long just to get pregnant with them, then I didn't get to carry them to term, and now I had to leave them in the hospital while I went home. I was beating myself up over it. I was in the worst mood that day. I made sure we spent as much time as possible in the NICU before we left. When we went in for our last visit of the day before leaving the hospital, the nurses allowed me to do something I had not done before. They let me hold both babies. I got to hold both of my babies at the same time. I cried the happiest tears! I held them so tightly and whispered to them...

"This was worth the wait."

 

On December 11th, Trey and I left the hospital one last time, but this time we left with our two miracle babies. It was almost like a dream leaving the hospital that day. It almost did not seem real. We were leaving the hospital with OUR babies. These two little lives were in our hands. These two lives we had hoped and prayed for over the last two and a half years were now in our hands for us to take home. I could not thank God enough. I was in constant prayer the entire ride home. 

Tomorrow Ryker and Averlee will be 3 weeks old. They were worth the wait. Looking into their sweet little faces makes every single failed treatment cycle, negative pregnancy test, heartbreaking test result, set back, roadblock, cancelled cycle, doctor visit, crying fit on the bathroom floor, surgery, blood draw, and injection in the abdomen worth it. They are worth it. 

Averlee and Ryker



Ryker and Averlee

My bright-eyed little boy

 

I'm not sure where this blog will go from this point forward, but I hope I'm able to continue documenting this wonderful journey. I hope each and every one of you have a very Merry Christmas.

Happy Birthday to Ryker and Averlee! Part 1

On Wednesday, December 3, 2014 at 6:34 and 6:35pm the world became a little sweeter. Ryker Christian Bell and Averlee Elizabeth Bell decided they didn't want to celebrate their birthdays on the day our doctor had scheduled my C-Section. Apparently December 3rd was more appealing to them! Here is their birth story...

On Tuesday afternoon, I began tracking contractions. I was having them about 12-15 minutes apart. They weren't awful. They were about as intense as the BH contractions I had been having for almost 10 weeks. As I mentioned in a previous post, I had already spent two nights in the hospital at 30 weeks due to threatened pre-term labor. During that hospital stay I was given two steroid injections to aid the babies' development along with magnesium sulfate to slow/ stop my contractions. Basically, I was tracking contractions on Tuesday but I didn't think anything about it because I felt fetal movement. As far as I knew, I had not lost my mucus plug and I did not have any bleeding. I assumed I was just having practice contractions. No big deal.

Tuesday night I slept all night long. Seriously. I only woke up once to pee. That's a huge deal when you have two tiny humans pressing on your bladder constantly. I woke up Wednesday, took Gavin to school, came home and just laid around until it was time to get ready for my weekly doctor visit. Trey was off work on Wednesday so he could run a few errands before our doctor appointment. When we were getting ready to leave the house, I told Trey I thought I would throw my hospital bag in the car just in case. I asked him if he wanted to put a bag in the car too. He said would just come get his stuff if he needed it. I was thinking we might have another over night stay in the hospital in our near future.... little did I know.

We had an ultrasound at 2:00 and a doctor appointment at 3:40. During our ultrasound, I was extremely uncomfortable. I've never wanted to rush through any of my bazillion ultrasounds, but I was completely over this one. I kept having contractions, which led to me having to roll over on my side off of my back. The tech told me Baby A - Ryker- was "very low". She also said Baby B - Averlee- was head down. I knew at this point that our days were numbered... little did I know.

When my nurse called my name to go back for my doctor appointment, I asked her if we would be doing a NST. I told her I was having frequent contractions. She said my doctor hadn't ordered one, but she would talk to my doctor and see what he said. When my doctor came in, he did not ask a lot of questions. He told us he was going to send us over to L&D to be checked and hooked up to the monitors. He told us we would probably go home that night, but we just needed to be checked out. 

So off we went to L&D. We made a few quick phone calls and sent a few texts, but we did not see any reason for everyone to rush to the hospital...little did I know. The time between the moment we got off the elevator on the 3rd floor of the hosptial and the time the twins were born was a complete whirlwind! When I was checked, the nurse started to prepare us mentally that we would be delivering soon. I was already at 5cm and the contractions were becoming stronger and more frequent. Ryker and Averlee were on their way and there was absolutely NO time to waste. Before we could even make a phone call to our parents and close friends, I had a room full of nurses trying to start my IV, draw blood for labs, and prep me for an emergency C-section. . . 

To be continued

A Thankful Thanksgiving

.... and a quick update.


What a difference a year makes, right? Whenever I think about it, my heart wants to explode with gratefulness and happiness. One year ago I was scheduling our consultation appointment with Nashville Fertility Center. One year ago my OB/GYN looked Trey and I in the eyes and told us he was at the end of his rope. He did not know what else to do, but he was determined not to give up and he didn't want us to give up either. We left his office with a referral to see a specialist at Nashville Fertility Center. My heart was shattered. I was terrified. I was angry. I was so disappointed.

Fast Forward.

Yesterday, the twins and I had our second NST (non-stress test).  As I was laying in the chair hooked up to all of my monitors, my OB/GYN came in to chat and see how I was doing. He asked, "Have we scheduled your C-Section yet? We need to do that." He told us it would be ideal to do it during week 37. We reminded him week 37 is the week of Christmas. That's fine with me, but I know my doctor has four girls at home. I wanted to make sure HE would be delivering our babies. He left the room for a few minutes. When he came back, he said, "December 26th. That will get you through Christmas with your son and you will be just over 37 weeks then." I was in shock. I was excited. I was scared all at the same time. For the last 30 something weeks I've known I cannot be pregnant forever and eventually my babies would have to come out so we can share them with everyone else, but at the same time... we worked so hard, prayed so hard, and waited so long just to be pregnant. I'm not ready for it to be over. Yes. I'm ready to see their little faces. I'm ready to be able to get out of bed without needing someone to give me a push. I'm ready to not have to worry about my bare belly peeking out from under maternity shirts that are suddenly too small. I'm ready to hold and rock our little miracles. I'm ready to read them stories and see their sweet smiles. I'm ready for all of that! I really am. It just all seems to have flown by to me. I feel like May 9th (the day I cheated and took a HPT before my first beta) was just yesterday. I've met women who have said they felt like they were pregnant forever. Me? I feel like I've only been pregnant for a little while even though it has been a full 33 weeks already. We have a date set for our C-Section. Ryker and Averlee will be here on December 26th unless they decide to choose their own birthday between now and then. This is all so real. My heart is so full and so excited, but I'm scared at the same time. God is trusting us with these two precious little miracle lives.

One year ago I never imagined I would be really super pregnant at Thanksgiving this year. I never imagined I would be expecting twins! One year ago I wasn't even sure I would ever carry another child in my womb. I'm carrying two and we have been blessed with a healthy, happy twin pregnancy. I'm so thankful. I'm so humbled. I'm so blessed. God is so good!  He heard every single prayer that was sent up on our behalf and He answered those prayers... times two.

We have so much to be thankful for this year. I just do not feel like this post does it justice. Words cannot describe how full my heart is this year.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Stay-at-Home Mom Adventures

I feel like I need to document this waiting period in my life. I've officially been a stay at home mom for the last eleven days. The first week was absolutely a whirlwind. I had so many things on my TO DO list that I wanted to get completed. I had somewhere to be and errands to run almost every day. Oh and let's not forget Gavin's brief stomach bug debacle. My first day at home, the school called Gavin's dad to say someone needed to come get him. Since I had resigned from job 30 minutes prior to the phone call, I told Gav's dad I would handle it. So I spent the first day of being a stay at home mom being the nurse to my 11 year old who had the yucky stomach virus. It was actually not that bad!

Gavin is only here three (and a half...ish) days a week, so I make the most of being his Mommy during that time. I've been able to drop him off at school and pick him up in the afternoons. I'm finally able to help him with homework, cook a REAL dinner for him and Trey each night, and just take time to chat with him. I'm not rushed. I'm not running in the door at 5:45 in the evening completely distraught and frazzled from the day. I honestly feel like I'm finally able to make being Gavin's mom and Trey's wife my #1 priority each day.

This week has been different. I haven't been sleeping well at night at all, so my energy level is not near what it was last week. I have a TO DO list for this week, but I'm not marking things off as quickly. We did finally break down and pay someone to come do a deep clean on our house. That took place on Wednesday and I have decided it was the best decision I ever made. It was such a good idea that we have decided to have someone clean our house bi-weekly from this point forward.

Basically, I talk to my dog all day, do laundry, dishes, and reorganize the nursery. Seriously. I sit in the nursery for almost an hour each morning sipping my peppermint hot tea and rearranging the changing table or closet. I believe this is part of nesting, maybe? Whatever it is, I cannot wait to walk into that room each morning and be greeted by two little miracle babies who need me.

Prayer Request:  if you could please remember my fellow blogger friend and TTC sister, Elana @ baby Ridley bump that would be wonderful. She has been fighting with every ounce of her being to receive her own miracle baby. She was a wonderful inspiration to me during my sad and dark days. She has always had words of encouragement for me and this week she needs all of the prayers, encouragement, positive vibes, love...whatever you can offer her. Infertility stinks.

Bumpdate - 32 Weeks

 

How Far Along?:  32w

Due Date: Our due date has been bumped to January 11th. The goal is to make it to December 22nd.

 

Weight Gain: I have actually started losing weight in the last 2 weeks. I became a stay-at-home mom as of a week ago. I'm going to blame the weight loss on me not sitting at a desk all day anymore. I can assure you, my eating habits have not improved since I've been home. I ate an entire sleeve of Oreos last week over the course of 5 days. I am drinking 2% milk daily. I am eating 5-6 small meals a day. I'm not sure what is going on. I plan to bring this up at our appointment on Wednesday.

 

Maternity Clothes: For the most part it is all I wear. On days I do not feel absolutely amazing, I typically throw on pre-pregnancy sweat pants and a maternity shirt. I don't stay in my pajamas all day!  

 

Sleep: Sleeping comfortably has become difficult over the last couple of nights. Zantac has helped with the acid reflux and heartburn; however, the size of my belly makes it really hard for me to turn over, get out of bed, and just basically sleep comfortably. I may try to add an extra pillow under my belly tonight and see if that helps.

Best Moment This Week:  We had our final baby shower on Saturday, so I spent most of the afternoon on Sunday organizing the nursery and doing the babies' laundry. It all seems so real now! The weeks are flying by and our babies will be here SO SOON!

Weird Pregnancy Moment:  Does anyone else find it difficult to pee in a cup when they go to the doctor? I mean...is it only me?! It seems like they would have an easier solution for those of us who have bellies that stick out extra far.

 

Movement: They BOTH had the hiccups last night during Sunday Evening Worship. It was the most insane feeling. Other than the hiccups, their punches and kicks are super strong now! Gavin got down next to my belly last night to "chat" with Averlee. She punched or kicked SO hard you could see the bump on my belly. She cannot wait to get out and see her big brother I think!

Symptoms: Same as last week.  The typical pregnancy stuff.... increased appetite, lack of energy, nesting, growing belly, back and hip pain. Contractions. Lots and lots of irregular contractions.

Cravings/ Aversions: Breakfast foods are my favorite and Oreos. Not together though.  

 

Anything Make You Queasy:  Not eating when I get hungry.

Genders: We are having a sweet little boy, Ryker Christian and a precious little girl, Averlee Elizabeth

 

What I'm Looking Forward To:  My 32w checkup with the Nurse Practitioner on Wednesday and my Non-Stress Test! I cannot wait to hear their little hearts racing. We will cross our fingers and say our prayers that we avoid any hospital stays this week!

 

 

I forgot to have someone take my bump picture yesterday, so I'll leave you with a few pics of our unfinished nursery!

Dear Babies:

Dear Ryker and Averlee:

Here we are. Two years ago you were just a dream to your Daddy and me. We prayed and prayed and prayed for you for over two years. God gave us you when the time was finally right. His plan for your lives is so beautiful. You two have already touched so many lives. It is just beautiful! I hope to tell you about it when you are older.

Thirty-two weeks ago our dream finally came true. Your Daddy and I are so excited to meet both of you! Personally, I've enjoyed all of the time I've spent with the two of you already. I have loved all of your kicks, flips, jabs, and high fives. Averlee, you've kept us on our toes at every ultrasound. We never know where you will be, what you will be doing, or which direction you will be facing. We can always count on you to have your hands beside your face though! Ryker, you've been the calm one on ultrasound days. I guess you do not have much room to move around when your sister is putting on her little shows, right? You both like to be very still when you know your Daddy is trying to feel you kick. You little stinkers!

As we patiently await your arrival, I keep thinking of things I cannot wait to do with you! I cannot wait to hold you both for the first time and tell you all about all of the wonderful people who prayed for you for so long. I cannot wait to feed you both. I cannot wait to see your Big Brother holding both of you. *Oh my heart*.... all of my babies together finally! What a blessing! I cannot wait to rock you both to sleep, dry your tears, and kiss your little cheeks. Averlee and Ryker, I have waited for what feels like forever to be your Mommy. I hope I do a good job. I hope you always know how much your Daddy, big brother, and I love you. I hope you know you wouldn't be my babies if it hadn't been for God. I cannot wait to teach you about your Heavenly Father and watch you both grow to know and love God. I look forward to watching you both achieve milestones together. I look forward to witnessing how much you two love each other. I have given up a paycheck, fancy clothes, high heels, Excel spreadsheets, reports, and bonuses so I can experience your dirty diapers, feeding you, holding you when you are sick, watching you take your first steps, hearing you speak your first words, and rocking you. Honestly, I think I made the best choice ever. I have chosen to be a full time Mommy to both of you and your Big Brother because it is all my heart desires. I just want to be your Mommy. I hope and pray with every ounce of my being I do a good job.

Ryker, your big brother cannot wait to teach you how to play ball! He already has a mini basketball picked out for you. Your Daddy cannot wait to teach you how to use your toy hammer, hunt, fish, and take things apart. You'll learn quickly that your Daddy is full of knowledge about so many things. I cannot wait to see what he teaches you! I'm sure you will spend a lot of time with him in his shop, learning how to "fix" things. You'll be your Daddy's little sidekick I bet!

Averlee, your big brother plans to teach you how to play ball too! You're going to be one well rounded little girl with two brothers! Don't worry, if you ever feel like being a girlie girl, Mommy is here for you! We can have girls day out and paint our nails if you want to. Big brother has taught me how play ball too though, so if you want me to play ball with you and your brothers in the yard, we can do that too! I'm sure your Daddy will take you hunting and fishing if you want to go too! I bet he even tells you the story about the day I slept on the ground while he hunted. It is probably one of his favorite stories! You'll have your Daddy wrapped around your little finger before you know it. I bet if you want to have a tea party, he will join you!


I cannot believe you will both be here in just a few weeks. Finally. Your Daddy and I cannot wait to meet you. Oh I cannot wait to see the look on your Daddy's face when he holds you! I cannot wait for you to meet him! Your Daddy is my best friend. I love him more today than I did yesterday. He has worked so hard to make sure our home is just perfect for both of you. He is so excited! I will always remember the look on his face the night I told him he was finally a Daddy. Averlee, I hope your future husband loves you and looks at you the way your Daddy does me. Ryker, I hope you love and laugh with your future wife the way your Daddy does me. You're both so blessed to have such a special man as your Daddy.

I can't write you this letter without telling you about your Big Brother! He is so excited to meet both of you!  Your brother has the biggest heart and is so full of patience. He held my hair when I was sick during my first few weeks as your Mommy. He has rubbed my back when you were in my ribs, Ryker! He has held my belly and felt you kick and wiggle, Averlee! He will be an amazing big brother. I hope you know you can always go to him if you need anything. I hope all three of you know how special and how important you are to me. God chose me to be your Mommy and that is not something I take lightly. Your big brother is smart too and oh so kind. I know if you ever need anything, he will be sure to take care of you!

I love you more than words can describe. Keep growing, my little miracles. I'll see you in a few weeks.

Love,
Mommy

Bumpdate - 31 Weeks

How Far Along?:  31w today. Praise God!

Due Date: Our due date has been bumped to January 11th; however, due to our brief visit in L&D last week I know we will never make it even remotely close to that day. The goal is to make it to December 22nd.

 

Weight Gain: I have quit keeping track. I'm packing on the pounds these last few weeks quicker than I can even do the math. So far my doctor is not alarmed, so I'm not worried about it. I believe my total weight gain is just over 50lbs. Not too bad for a twin pregnancy!

 

Maternity Clothes: It is all I wear!

 

Sleep: I nap daily around 1:00. I'm in bed and completely asleep by 9:00 each night. Thanks to the makers of Zantac I am no longer awake at 1:00am breathing fire or choking on stomach acid. (Too graphic? No?) I'm not very comfortable, and I do toss and turn a lot.... BUT I'm sleeping all night which is a HUGE step in the right direction!

Best Moment This Week:  We were discharged from L&D on Saturday morning. At this point, each day I'm still pregnant is a GOOD day.

Weird Pregnancy Moment:  I cannot think of any for this week. Darn. I'm usually really good at coming up with these!

 

Movement: They have definitely slowed down, but they are still moving and wiggling. Averlee still likes to put her feet INSIDE of my rib cage. Ryker is still punching and kicking down low.  

Symptoms:  The typical pregnancy stuff.... increased appetite, lack of energy, nesting, growing belly, back and hip pain. Contractions. Lots and lots of irregular contractions.

Cravings/ Aversions: Just give me some Oreos and some milk please.

 

Anything Make You Queasy:  Not eating when I get hungry.

Genders: We are having a sweet little boy, Ryker Christian and a precious little girl, Averlee Elizabeth

 

What I'm Looking Forward To:  We have our 31w checkup, growth scan, and post-hospital stay doctor visit today. That's a lot of excitement packed into one afternoon, right?  We are hoping for GOOD news! We also have one last baby shower this weekend with Trey's family. It is still up in the air if I will be attending. The shower is almost an hour and half away from home. We are going to play it by ear and see how I feel Saturday morning. Trey and I are in agreement that I do not need to completely drain myself just to go to a baby shower. We will see what happens.