9.26.2015

An Infertility Journey Does Not End at Birth

A few weeks ago I told my husband how badly I wished we could go out to eat with the twins and nobody interrupt our meal. I said it out of frustration. I didn't really mean it... well maybe I did just a little. R&A have recently fully graduated to high chairs in restaurants, which means they usually sit at the end of the table for all to see versus when we would tuck them away in the booth beside us. Now strangers come over and talk to us while we are either trying to feed the twins quickly before our own food arrives or when we are trying to eat our own food before one of the twins either (a) decides sitting in the high chair is no longer fun or (b) blows out their diaper. One of the two is always inevitable. A couple weeks ago a restaurant employee came over to talk to us. She was telling us about her daughter who has twins and the things her twins do. She then asked the question I despise the most (aside from the "are they identical?" question of course). She asked which one of us had twins in our family. Our response was of course, "No". She then proceeded to argue with me saying, "Well honey, one of you has to have twins in your family." I gave her a blank stare. Exhaled. Then the words just flowed out of my mouth. "Twins do not run in our family. Our twins are miracle babies. We waited two years for them." By that, she thought I meant they were adopted. I was trying so hard to avoid telling our infertility story in the middle of a restaurant. At this point the table beside us was already listening in on the conversation. The restaurant employee wouldn't let it go - or let us finish our meal without her 20 questions. So I told her, "No. They are not adopted. We had to do artificial insemenation." There ya go. In the middle of a restaurant while we were trying to eat and enjoy our time together as a family, I had to share that my husband and I could not have children on our own. All because a restaurant employee obviously couldn't mind her own business. 

I can see how we may have been able to blend into the crowd if had not had twins. People are so fascinated with twins. People ask so many questions. Some are good questions. Some are a little silly. Example: "Are they identical?" Do people even realize what it means to be an identical twin? I believe the first criteria would be for them to be the same gender. Just throwing that out there. 

The truth is, I'm ok with not blending into the crowd though. I love telling people how God gave us our precious miracles, but sometimes I'd really like to be able to make it through a dinner without having someone grill me about how I got pregnant with twins. 

2 comments:

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